Seniors Better Together, Part 3, with DeAnne Clune
In the first Answers for Elders radio show of 2021, managing director DeAnne Clune talks about Seniors Better Together, which teams up with senior living providers across the country to share positive stories of what is happening in their communities. This segment focuses on some of the concerns families have with senior living arrangements.
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*The following is the output of transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors.
The following is a podcast from a qualified senior care providers part on the answers for elders radio show. And Welcome back everyone to answers for elders radio and I here am here again with Dan Clune from seniors better togethercom and Dan, I am so glad you’re with us. Thank you so much for being with us for this hour. I thank you, Susan my pleasant. You know, obviously here it answers for elders radio, we get a lot of questions. You know what you the service that you provide, obviously for our families, is a real important one because it’s really consumer education. I think a lot of concerned familys have are because they don’t necessarily understand the process, they don’t understand the industry, and of course that’s what we’re here for, is to educate our consumers and obviously, with seniors better together. Tell us a little bit about some of the concerns that families sometimes have. Sure well, you know, we’ve worked with hundreds of communities across the country and marketing and sales people in that will who interact directly with consumers, with prospective residents and their family members, and you know, actually been number one. You know, words or word. What we hear people say is I’m not ready yet. Well, that can entail a lot of things, right, so that getting to the heart of that matter is important. That a lot of times it involved people again and feeling like what they’re giving up rather than what they’re moving towards. And so we hear people saying things like, you know, I don’t want to give up my independence, and the experience I have witnessed and what residents have told me time and again is the exact opposite. Is True that they actually feel more freedom and independence in moving to a community because the things they don’t want to do have been taken away, such as, you know, helpful maintenance and you know, that sort of thing, versus now having the time to focus on the things they want to do now they’re not mowing the lawn and cleaning gathers and stubblings now and replacing the furnace. Right. So it’s actually very free and empowering to make a move like this, and I mean my very first I started working in senior living. Gosh, Oh, I’ll twenty two years now, and my we were opening a community and spoken on I was helping the company I worked for do that, and so we have lots of open houses, lots of people come through and this was my first experience and senior living and all day long that, you know, this is what I’m hearing. I’m hearing these people looking at this gorge is beautiful new building with amazing amenities and wonderful programs and just, you know, really kind of poohing the idea that once we help them through the stands this, you know, kind of through that decision making process and actually moving in. Ninety nine point nine percent of them always said, I cannot believe I waited so long. I wish I would have been seen her. I had no idea it was this great. They kind of come into you know, packing a lot of baggage and negative perceptions for a variety of reasons, and so seeing is believing, I guess. Is what I would say. And these days make that is still possible with virtual means. People are doing save time tours and zoom tours and videos urs and things like that. You can still get a feel for the place. I think what you’re saying is really really so pallid because, you know, I think the number one thing that I will get from families is that. Well, DAD’s not willing to move. You know, you’ll have to take him out and applying box, you know, feet first, kind of thing. And and my point is is what is the motivating factor? The fact is it that you really think, and I this is what I will say, do you think dad wants to sit by himself day after day, have to figure out what he’s going to eat every day, how he’s going to get to the store, how is he going to prepare his meals? How is he going to make sure that he takes all his medications? So what about all the things? It’s like, these aren’t the things that are holding him there. What’s holding him in in his home is the fact that he’s a he’s afraid of the unknown. Again, it’s asking them to make that leap of faith. And so, you know, my encouragement to families have always been, you know, great thing to do once his pandemic is over, take dad to a group event. If you’ve kind of selected a community, they do like special dinners and parties and all kinds of things. And you know, in many cases go for the community, try their food out, meets people that live there, start to ingratiate, you know, and engage with people. So now it’s not such a it’s just scary thing. It’s a known place. They understand the community and I think that’s one of the things. It certainly helps. But I think the other thing is is that allow dad to be a part of the process. You know, I don’t want to be in a place where, you know, I feel like I’m a cattle. You know, I don’t want to be in a large community, whatever that is. Listen to their most important values, and I think that’s the important thing as well. Wouldn’t you agree with that? Oh, yes, but you have to involve the person. This is their lies, this is, you know, where they will be living. And yes, there there’s a lot of fear of the unknown and because of that people throw up various reasons. Right, I can’t because of this, I can’t because of that. That the other just heartwear me. And thing I love about my job. You know, when I work with resident perspective, residents, and see them move in and assimilating happily into their new community, the so many unexpected great things happen, and a community I was just working with in southern Oregon this happened all the time where they run into people all the time that they know and maybe it’s someone they went to high school with them they haven’t seen them since, or I it someone you know they’re they’re latewise best friend, or you know, it’s this I’ll starts of happy reunions are taking place, and so there’s these where you know, kind of intangible things that a person can’t now until they experience it. So yes, so helping the person you’re you’re trying to encourage just to be open minded, the proactive, consider the options and and taken a legitimate look at what these options are and you’ll know when it’s the right place. You’ll feel right, right and and so, obviously, once you guys to find okay, it’s the time to make a move, then there’s a monumental task of downsizing into a large homage was smaller home. What kind of tips do you have for that? Yes, this is a big one and you know, anyone who’s ever moved anywhere knows, you know how difficult it can be. And so you can imagine if someone has lived in the same home for decades and accumulated a lifetime of possessions and memories. You know this is makes it extra hard. So one of the best of presses I’ve seen is to focus on the new space. So again, it can be so are whelming to be. What do I do with my stuff? What do it has? What do I do about getting the House ready to sell? And I have to sell if that’s not a necessity. Absolutely, you know, it’s an absolute deal breaker that the house has city all pristine and ready to sell before you moved to your new community. That’s the ideal world, because you can then not worry about that focus on my news face, how I want to set that up to be cozy and comfortable and for either bring my favorite things or maybe I’m tired and I want some music. You know, right, right, so about the way you want and when, when that is taken care of, you can, you know, take care of what you need to do with the House and the rest of your belongings. And there’s so many resources in any community you would ever move into can provide you with specific resources in your local market of people who can help you if you need to do an estate sale or, you know, downsize your possessions or get your house ready to get it on the market. You know all sorts of people, moving companies, real estate agents, you know, ready willing able to help you with that part. So I say get the line, go go to the gain fire and then right get get the assistant you need and whatever way it may be to take care of selling the house well. And I think the other thing to remember is if you’re going to be eating meals in a dining room, you’re not going to need the degree of kitchen appliances that you have in your house. You’re not going to very it’s a totally different lifestyle. So understanding to take the bare minimum and then try to say, for two weeks, let’s just see how it goes. If you find that you need something later, then bring it in after that and take the time, if you can, to pack up the House, and that’s a great task. I always am an advocate also for moving mom or dad first before you start downsizing the house. There’s other options. One option definitely would be most communities will have a guest unit, so you can rent the guests unit and obviously while you’re moving your your loved one in to their apartment, they can be there at the community that can start eating meals and they don’t have to be in the middle of seeing their they’re living. You know where they’ve been living, being dismantled and things like that. I think, yeah, things are some really great ways that emotionally it’s better. So, Dan, tell us a little bit about how we reach you. You could go to our website, seniors better togethercom. You can email us at Info at seniors better togethercom and of course we invite people to go to our facebook pads as well and comment there well. We’re very excited to have you on the show today and certainly let’s pick some time in our next segment talking about how the pandemic is affected everyone, you know, is especially in the senior living world. There’s a lot of things happening, but a lot of great things happening and keeping our seniors sit safe and so everyone. Dane will be right back right after this answers for elders radio show with Suzanne Newman. Hopes you found this podcast useful in your journey of navigating senior care. Check out more podcasts like this to help you find qualified senior care experts and areas of financial, legal, health and wellness and living options. Learn about our radio show, receive our monthly newsletter, receive promotional discounts and meet our experts by clicking on the banner to join the Senior Advocate Network at answers for elders, radiocom. Now there is one place to find the answers for elders
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Originally published January 10, 2021