8 Things Every Senior Deserves, part 3

*The following is the output of transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors.

The following is a podcast from a qualified senior care provider, hurt, on the answers for elders radio show. And welcome back everyone. We are here with Rebecca Bowman, CEO of Sash Services, and stands for sell a seniors home, and we’ve been talking about everything that is senior, or the eight points that seniors deserve when it comes time to selling their home. And it’s really about all the things that, you know, we have to think about as family members as we support our loved ones. If you’re a professional out there, that realtor or even a placement advisor or anything like that. I think these are concepts that we all should subscribe to and Rebecca, I’m so glad you’re here to share it today. So we are on, believe it or not, number five. Do you want to just quickly give us what we’ve covered so far? Yes, so, of the eight things that every senior homeowner deserves in their homesale, what we’ve covered so far is kindness patients. Let them have decisionmaking and knowledge and information, all of these. NOPE, nobody should be without any of those. Sure. And so now we’re rolling into number five. And so what I encourage with my family’s the seniors that I help is, I say, take something from the home that you love that you can have in your new place, something that reminds you of the memories that you had in your home for all of those years, the decades you live there. Now there are some folks who want to take their whole house and so that doesn’t always fit. No, but you know, they have to pair down and there’s a lot of decisions that I can’t take this, I can’t take that. They have to leave behind their huge dining table where they had the Thanksgiving dinners. They can’t bring their China anymore. What can they bring that when they’re in their new apartment, when they’re in their assistant living they can see it and it warms their heart, brings them happiness. It’s comfort, it’s familiarity. So a few examples of things that clients have taken is from their home is a big quilt that they made where they just hang the whole quilt on their wall and their new place, favorite paintings, Afghans, even a small rolltop desk that’s been in the family and it meets so much to them to keep spoon collections and American flag. One gentleman I just helped in the last few months has a model car collection. Oh Wow, we hauled huge China cabinets up into their little third story apartment so he could display his hundred and fifty model cars. Oh my word, that is a credible that’s what he wanted and that’s what he should get. Yeah, and so these mementos, and so it sounds like you’ve had experience with this too. You know, we were talking about this before and and I remember exactly. My mom was all about family. We lived when we grew up in Antichordis and we lived right on the water, and so we had lots of we were out of boat. We you know, we’re out in the water all the time. Memories, and so what my cousin and I did is we went through her family photos. This is when we were getting ready to go through everything, and we actually pulled it, you know, memories, pictures of, you know, kids on a raft down that the beach. We had pictures of dinner parties that they had, that you know, that my parents would have. There was a picture, I remember, of my mom and dad playing the piano and organ together, you know, and you know, just little things like that. So what we did is we took a conglomeration of probably fifty pictures, five thousand and seventy five pictures, and we did a collage of you know, we just took it down and we did everything, and then we did these, you know, these collage frames and we just laid him out and that whole wall and in her assistant living when she woke up, the first thing to do is sit up in bed and it was right across from the foot of her bed. I bet it butter saw all those pictures and it was like she cried when she saw it. Oh, it was a surprise when she moved in, and I think that was something that really made it special for her, because she knew every time she woke up that she was lost, and I that’s really what was the goal and exactly, you know, it was one day, but look what it gave her every single day. And you know, those collages. Even as her health digressed and even when she was in skilled nursing, we were it’s still able to put those pictures of really special you can get a puzzle made out of someone’s home and yeah, you can go on like costcocom, the blanket made of a photo. There’s so many ways to make momentos and it means so much. Yeah, yeah, so it seems like a small thing but, as you describe, it was a really big thing for huge thing for her, and I’m never worth skipping our number six thing that we believe every senior homeowner deserves in their homesale is caring advocates. And I want to say that caring advocates can be anyone. It can be anyone that comes alongside the senior homeowner and is there to walk through this big step with them if they’re looking out for their wellbeing. It could be a neighbor, it could be someone from the Church or synagogue. It could be family members, but I see a lot of family members that aren’t the adult children, their grandchildren, niece’s, sister’s Daughterinlaw, you know, different for the adult children may not necessarily be a quote unquote, caring advocate. Right be at all or I mean I’m sadly absent, yeah, or just disconnected and on and not in living in reality either. Right, things and and and I think sometimes that makes it more difficult for a senior because, yes, I want to make sure that they’re you know, in a situation where they’re surrounded with people that are supporting the moves that they’re exactly and a caring advocate can also be any of the professionals that the senior hires to help through their process. And so one of the things we really believe strongly at sash is something I call a circle of care, which is all the professionals that are around the senior while they’re going through these stages of downsizing and getting care. It could be a policeman advisor, it could be a home health aid, it could be their realtor the downsizer. You know, when we pay our downsiz or to help pack our clients homes, we tell them, when they start to tell a story about that picture, stop and listen. That’s them being the caring advocate, not saying well, we don’t have time for this, let’s just pack this box. You know, you know, and that’s a really good question. are good point to bring up, because even though family members may feel like I’ve heard this story before, mom, I you don’t need to tell me that. To me again, sure as I don’t care if you’ve heard the story twenty times. This is a process. It is and them telling those stories is part of that. Trying to that process closure away from the home and being able to let go of all those items. Yeah, Um, so sometimes I am the only caring advocate in my clients life. As they’re going through their homesale, there is no one. They are literally completely alone in the world and all I think is, I’m so glad it’s to me. I’m so glad I’m here. Yeah, because I’m going to fight for you. I’m going to fight for every nickel in your home sale. I’m not going to let anyone take advantage of you and when you go through that scary day of settling into your new apartment, I’m going to be there with you on moving day and you’re not going to have to do this yourself. So there’s a few roles that caring advocates can fill. I’ve got a couple here and I know you probably have some. Two is caring advocates protect the senior homeowner from being taken advantage of. Really important, a second pair of eyes and ears. They protect the seniors best interests. They provide emotional support and encouragement along the way and if that’s having a little cry session at the end of a packing day because it’s been so emotionally draining and overwhelming, then that’s it. That’s what a caring advocate allows them to do. Caring advocates bring time, energy, resources, ideas, expertise so that the path is easier and less lonely. Sure, and they shouldn’t be by themselves while they’re going through so just this morning Susannah was sitting in a seniors home who’s by himself. His home is falling apart around him and he does not have anyone. His family is in California and I’m the only one who’s here in this state who can take care of him. And he looked at me and he said, it sounds like you’re going to help make this easy for me, and I said yes, that’s why I’m here. I’m going to be with you every step of the way. I’m your realtor, but I’m you’re carrying advocate, and I didn’t use those words, but that’s that’s what I’m there for. Yeah, also, caring advocates can spot warning signs when the seniors physical or emotional hell starts to take a real toll from the transition process, from the packing and moving from the overwhelming nature of it. So they can kind of take a break. Let’s take a breather, take a nap, have a sandwich, let’s take a week off, just regroup. Yeah, and finally, they can offer alternatives or pivots or ideas that are in tune with the senior specific needs, because everyone has unique specific needs that should be listened to and the caring advocate is picking up on those and Ye sure that they’re being honored and how this whole process goes. Yeah, and you know, Rebecca, that goes that carrying advocate. You know, I know that that I had in many ways when I was moving my mom, I have my cousin came up and I remember when we were packing up her house to sell it and she had every thing in the world in her basement and boxes, you know, like piano recitals, programs and you know, you name it. Yeah, the thing that was really good is is that at night, I remember, you know, after we’d gone through all this cusin because we were hurrying, I was able to share my thoughts that night at dinner and she gave me the space to be able to do that, to cry, and we cried. I cried, she cried about the things that we’d let go of non getting me hearing. But that’s the thing. I think that’s so important that there is that person that helps facilitate that. So that is such a valuable thing. Absolutely, absolutely, and no senior should have a real turn that isn’t also a caring advocate. Yeah, they shouldn’t have somebody who just list their home and that’s all they do and they just put papers in front of them to sign in it. That’s all they do. They should bring heart with them, they should bring care and kindness with them. They should bring a passion for making sure that seniors interests are served and not just going through the clinical steps of the sale. Yeah, so, Rebecca, we’re almost through. We’ve got two more, two more bills of right to go for. In the meantime, how do we reach it? Check out our website at Sash Servicescom. Sash Servicescom, and just remind everyone saft services. You, sir, people pretty much throughout western Washington, is that correct, and sometimes in eastern Washington demanding. Is that correct? Yep, yes, all over. Yes, and certainly if somebody is outside the state of Washington, you probably can connect them with someone very much across the country. That can help in absolutely asidy. So again, Rebecca will be back with the final two writes of a senior right after this answers for elders radio show with Suzanne Newman. Hopes you found this podcast useful in your journey of navigating senior care. Check out more podcasts like this to help you find qualified senior care experts and areas of financial, legal, health and wellness and living options. 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